Should you pick up a toddler every time it cries?

Toddlers demand constant attention. Many toddlers want to be picked up all the time. It is a common issue many parents face when their babies reach toddler age. Toddlers usually cry to draw their parent’s attention and insist to be held. 

They generally do this because they need reassurance and warmth. They feel secure, calm, and safe with their parents.

Now the question is “should you pick up a toddler every time it cries?” Holding your toddler every time she or he cries may not be the solution to the problem. 

You need to figure out the reason for your toddler’s cry and try to handle it. There are many reasons for your toddler crying and wanting to be picked up. 

Irrespective of the reason, it is essential to understand your kid’s problem and resolve it instead of ignoring their cries all the time.

Should you pick up a toddler every time it cries?

You can pick up your toddler when they cry. It is OK to hold them when they need you. It will not spoil them or create a habit. You will not spoil your kid by cuddling, holding them up, or meeting their needs when they cry. However, sometimes a parent can’t pick up their toddler when they cry. In such a situation, it is also fine not to pick up your child. Instead, try to acknowledge your kid’s feelings and build a loving relationship. Use alternate ways to handle them so that you don’t have to pick them up every time they cry.

When to stop carrying your child

There is no magic age or strict rule to stop picking up your child all at once. 

However, many children become heavy or bulky around 2 years of age which makes it difficult for parents to carry them for a long time. 

Carrying a too heavy toddler for hours can strain your back. 

You should keep a stroller with you on long outings if your toddler refuses to walk.

What to do when your toddler cries to be held up all the time?

Many toddlers pass through a stage where they need more attention from their parents and want to help up all the time. It is a temporary stage and your kid will eventually outgrow it. 

They will soon realize that they can move fast on their own feet. 

Till then, you will have to remain calm and know that once your toddler decides to discover the world independently, you will miss the way they clung to you so fiercely.

Never punish, smack or shout

It is never a good idea to punish your child when they cry or want you to hold them. 

Never shout or smack them as it will impart a sense of shame and doubt that will result in a sense of discouragement and thus a need for further attention.

Ignore them but not all the times

You can try ignoring them consistently to let them understand that crying for no reason will not be effective in forcing parents to hold them. 

However, it is not fine to ignore them all the time. Toddlers need attention and a feeling that they are loved.

Build independence in your toddler

Building independence in your toddler is a long-term solution to get through the phase of life when they want to be held and cries for it. 

Praise your kid when they do something independently and provide them opportunities to succeed. 

Let your child help you with household chores and praise them for their independent rising. Praise your little one when they walk with you and don’t ask to be carried. 

It will help break the habit of being carried.

Should you pick up a toddler every time it cries?

Distract your toddler when you can’t pick them up

Distracting or entertaining your toddlers when they want you to hold them is a good short-term solution to the problem. 

In case, you are unable to carry your toddler at a time, begin playing the game out of walking. 

Race with your toddler or ask them to run and you will time them. You can do anything that involves walking to make it more fun.

Create closeness with your toddler without carrying them

You will have to find ways to perform your daily tasks while keeping your toddler close. 

You can let them stand up on a chair or stool when you are cooking. Try to find out how they can help you in whatever you are doing. 

For instance, if you are working on a laptop or folding clothes, try to set up an area nearby to let them play or help you with what you are doing. 

If your little ones protest, reassure them that you are there if they need you. You are there whether or not they are being held.

Carry them when your toddler cries to be held, sometimes

Sometimes, you just have to pick them up. In fact, carrying a toddler is one of the biggest joys of parenthood. They are little, loving, and sweet and they need you so much. 

We know that it is sometimes hard to hold a toddler but they need you. It is typical behavior of a toddler to be carried or picked up. 

When it’s reasonable and safe, holding them is a good choice.

Conclusion

Should you pick up a toddler every time it cries? You can hold them when they cry. Toddlers cry for a reason or maybe without any reason. It is important to know the reason for their crying and resolve it to prevent toddlers make it a habit. 

If your toddler cries all the time for no reason and you can’t carry them every time, you can try using some of the ideas and tips we discussed in this article. 

Try to talk to your toddler and let them understand that you can’t pick them up every time. 

Also, attempt to figure out the reason for their cries as picking them up every time may not resolve the underlying issue.

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